QA問答：為什么我應(yīng)該為自己是亞洲人而自豪，而不是希望自己是白人？

To which Gloria Thomson replied: “I didn't want to be white. I just wanted to be free.”
As a minority, I often wonder what my life would be like if I were white. And I realized I knew what my life would be like if I were white because I lived that life when I was in China. In fact, every time I traveled back to China, I felt it. I can blend in. I’m no longer an outsider, even if I hold a blue passport instead of a red one. I can be just a person instead of an “Asian-” person. I can walk the street as if I own the place. Nobody will ever ask me, “Where are you REALLY from?” Nobody will have a weird fetish about how I would behave in bedrooms.
And then I came back to the US, I’m an “Asian-” again.

對此，Gloria Thomson 的回答是：“我不想成為一個白人，我只是想要自由?！?br /> 作為少數(shù)民族，我經(jīng)常會想，如果我是白人，我的生活會是什么樣子？
我意識到，我自己很清楚，如果我是白人，我的生活會是什么樣子的，因為我在中國的時候，我就過著這樣的生活。
事實上，每次我回到中國，我都有這種感覺。我可以融入其中。我不再是一個局外人，即使我持有藍色護照而不是紅色護照。我可以只是一個人，而不是一個“亞洲人”。我可以自由的走在街上，就好像我擁有這個地方一樣。沒有人會問我，“你到底從哪里來？”。沒有人會認為我待在臥室的表現(xiàn)，是一種怪異的戀物癖。
然后，我回到了美國，我又成為了一個“亞洲人”。

I didn’t change. My skin color didn’t change. My social context changed.
It isn’t about wanting to be white. It is about wanting to be treated with respect, given the benefit of the doubt, and be part of the community, like a white person would. It is about wanting the same opportunity and freedom that white people enjoy.
This is true for all underprivileged and marginalized groups when they express wanting to be part of the privileged group. It was never about them “betraying” their people or being ashamed of their heritage. It’s about wanting to have the same social status as the dominating group. It is about being able to walk on the street and not be treated like an outsider or second-class citizen.
It is about wanting to be free.

我沒有變。我的膚色也沒有變。我的社會背景發(fā)生了變化。
這不是想成為白人。這是關(guān)于希望得到尊重，能夠得到疑罪從無的好處，并像白人一樣成為社區(qū)的一部分。這是關(guān)于想要和白人一樣的機會和自由。
當所有弱勢和邊緣化群體，表示希望成為特權(quán)群體的一部分時，他們都是如此。這不是他們想要“背叛”他們自己的人民，或者是在為自己的傳統(tǒng)感到羞愧。
這是關(guān)于想要擁有與統(tǒng)治群體相同的社會地位。這是關(guān)于能夠走在街上，而不是被當作局外人或二等公民對待。
這是關(guān)于想要自由。

So perhaps you’re asking the wrong question. You felt that you were “forced” by your family and/or community to be proud of your Asian heritage, but in your heart of hearts, you just want to be white.
But do you want to be white? Do you want potato salad with raisins and food with no seasoning? Or do you want what white people wanted: freedom, acceptance, opportunities, priority treatment in society, being given the benefit of the doubt in suspicious situations, being treated with leniency in the penal system…

所以，也許你問錯了問題。你覺得自己是被家人和/或社區(qū)“強迫”，為自己的亞洲傳統(tǒng)感到驕傲的，但在你的內(nèi)心深處，你只想成為白人。
但是，你想成為白人嗎？你要加葡萄干的土豆沙拉和不加調(diào)味品的食物嗎？還是你想要白人想要的：自由、接受、機會、在社會中的優(yōu)先待遇、疑罪從無的好處、在刑事系統(tǒng)中得到寬大處理……

“There must be in-groups whom the law protects but does not bind, alongside out-groups whom the law binds but does not protect.”
You are a member of the out-group. And you want to be a member of the in-group. You just lack the social understanding of the white supremacist structure, so you see it as a “minority vs. white” issue.
The reality is you will never be white. It doesn’t matter how many backyard BBQs you host or how conservative “mainstream” you are; American society will never consider you “white.” You will always be Asian American. And I think deep down, you don’t want to be white, or at least don’t really care about the skin color either. What you want, and what we all want, is the racial privilege that comes with being white.
The only thing you can do is to make the American society more inclusive. Fight for equality for all, and maybe one day, minority children wouldn’t need to secretly hope that they’re white and then feel guilty and ashamed about it.

“內(nèi)群體：法律保護但不約束的群體；外群體：法律約束但不保護的群體?！?br /> 您是外群體的成員。你想成為內(nèi)群體的一員。你只是缺乏對白人至上主義結(jié)構(gòu)的社會理解，所以你認為這是一個“少數(shù)族裔 VS 白人”的問題。
現(xiàn)實是你永遠不會是白人。不管你主持了多少后院BBQ，也不管你是多么保守的“主流”，美國社會永遠不會認為你是“白人”。你永遠是亞裔美國人。
我認為，在內(nèi)心深處，你不想成為白人，或者至少也不真正關(guān)心膚色。你想要的，也是我們所有人想要的，是作為白人所帶來的種族特權(quán)。
你唯一能做的就是讓美國社會更加包容。為所有人的平等而戰(zhàn)，也許有一天，少數(shù)民族兒童，不需要再偷偷的希望自己是白人，然后，為此感到內(nèi)疚和羞愧。

Manthi Nguyen
Beautifully written. Thank you. I have always enjoyed your insightful answers.

寫得很棒。非常感謝。我一直很喜歡你富有洞察力的回答。

Mia Cooper
Beautiful answer! as a Black woman i completely agree.
We dont want to be White. We want to be free; free to be ourselves!

漂亮的答案！作為一個黑人女性，我完全同意。
我們不想成為白人。我們想要自由；自由地做自己！

Matthew Harris
Your last paragraph seems like it should be everyone’s mission if we want a better world. My ex-wife is Japanese so our two kids are mixed race. I seriously underestimated how much identity pressure they would experience. We raised our kids mostly in Austin, TX, so a medium size city that had significant minority populations. In those early years I naively believed such forces were attenuating and would not be such a large factor in their lives. These things change slower than we need them to.

如果我們想要得到一個更美好的世界，你的最后一段似乎應(yīng)該是每個人的使命。我的前妻是日本人，所以我們的兩個孩子是混血兒。我嚴重低估了他們會經(jīng)歷多大的身份壓力。我們的孩子大部分時候在德克薩斯州的奧斯汀長大，這是一個中等規(guī)模的城市，有大量的少數(shù)民族人口。
在早些年，我天真地認為這種力量正在減弱，不會成為他們生活中的一個重要因素。這些變化比我們需要的要慢得多。

My kids are grown leading full lives, and are mostly comfortable in their identities. But as a parent there were some jolting moments along the way. It is astounding how so many people just have to put someone into a specific slot when they meet, and all they need is a quick glance to do so. I could write a long post just on dealing with the idiotic assumptions thrown at my kids, and those would be only the ones I know about.

我的孩子們，在成長過程中過著充實的生活，他們大多數(shù)時候，對自己的身份感到舒適。但作為一名家長，一路上也有一些震驚的時刻。
令人震驚的是，有這么多人在見面時，會把某人放在一個特定的位置上，而他們所需要的只是快速地看一眼就可以決定了。我可以寫一篇很長的文章，來處理針對我孩子的愚蠢假設(shè)，而這些都是我所知道的。

The issues around race identity were more difficult for my daughter than my son. Dad bias aside, my daughter is remarkably beautiful. When she was a child it was a common experience to be approached by model recruiters wanting her to work with them. I am talking about dozens of occasions. (It was actually the first big disagreement I had with my ex.) My ex thought it would be a cool experience, while I was deeply wary of the message it sends. We wound up compromising and allowing some limited photo shoots for ads promoting kid products. The superficiality of the ad biz always bothered me.

關(guān)于種族認同的問題，對我女兒來說，比我兒子更困難。拋開爸爸的偏見不談，我的女兒非常漂亮。當她還是個孩子的時候，模特招聘人員想讓她和他們一起工作，這種事情經(jīng)常發(fā)生。我們談?wù)摿藥资畟€機會。這實際上是我和前任之間的第一次大分歧，我的前任認為，這將是一次很酷的經(jīng)歷，而我對此非常謹慎。我們最終妥協(xié)了，允許為宣傳兒童產(chǎn)品的廣告拍攝一些有限的照片。廣告業(yè)的膚淺總是困擾著我。

As a dad, I was always glad that my kids felt like they could (mostly) talk with me about what was going on in their lives. As a teenager, my daughter had to learn early how to navigate the fetish energy coming her way (lots of angles including when in Japan). As adults, my kids seem to have a magnetic energy attracting people navigating identity issues of all kinds. I suppose it is a learned skill, like most things.

作為一名父親，我一直很高興，我的孩子們覺得他們（大部分時候）可以和我談?wù)撍麄兊纳?。十幾歲的時候，我女兒就必須盡早的學會如何做一個偶像（包括在日本的時候）。作為成年人，我的孩子們似乎有一種磁性能量，很容易得到人們的喜愛，來處理各種身份問題。我想這是一種習得的技能，就像大多數(shù)事情一樣。

Michel Saint-Ghislain
So so sad… I hope US will evolve. Well it IS evolving, but it is such rooted that the process takes ages and generation after generation.
Thankfully there is no such thing here in Switzerland, I mean children don’t secretly hope that they are white. Even though we are a quite conservative country in most matters compared to our neighbors.

太令人難過了……我希望美國會發(fā)展。它正在進化，但它是如此根深蒂固，以至于這個過程需要很長時間，一代又一代人。
值得慶幸的是，瑞士沒有這樣的事情，我的意思是，孩子們不會私下里希望自己是白人。盡管與我們的鄰國相比，我們在大多數(shù)事情上都是一個相當保守的國家。

Suzanne Yoon
Because you are who you are, like it or not! Why shouldn’t you be proud to be Asian? I’m Asian and am proud to be one. Not all white people like being white either. Each of us has a lot to offer to the world regardless of race or ethnicity. Focus on your talents and abilities. Concentrate on being kind to others, loving your friends & family and living well. What we can bring to the table is more important than wanting to be someone else. Best wishes to you!

不管你喜不喜歡，你就是你自己！為什么你不應(yīng)該為自己是亞洲人而感到自豪？
我是亞洲人，我為自己是亞洲人而自豪。也不是所有的白人都喜歡成為白人。
無論種族或民族，我們每個人都可以為世界提供很多。專注于你的天賦和能力。專注于善待他人，愛你的朋友和家人，過上好日子。我們能帶來什么，比想成為別人更重要。向你致以最良好的祝愿！
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Jacques Lebrun
You shouldn't be proud of being Asian or white. Think about cars: Would you be proud to own a car that's white? The color doesn't say much about the car, does it? A white car can be an excellent car or a terrible one. Would you be proud to own a European car? Again, it depends on the car. With people it's the same. You should be proud of the unique individual that you are. The rest is irrelevant. Do you know how many people in this world are white or Asian? That's not a thing to be proud of.

你不應(yīng)該為自己是亞洲人或白人而感到驕傲。想想汽車：你會為擁有一輛白色的汽車而自豪嗎？顏色并不能說明這輛車的好壞，不是嗎？一輛白色的車可以是一輛優(yōu)秀的車，也可以是一輛糟糕的車。你會為擁有一輛歐洲汽車而自豪嗎？同樣，這取決于汽車。和人一樣。你應(yīng)該為自己的獨特個性感到自豪。其余的都無關(guān)緊要。你知道這個世界上有多少人是白人或亞洲人嗎？這不是一件值得驕傲的事情。

Marc H
I am a relatively short man. I can think of a hundred things “wrong” with that, opportunities I was at a significant disadvantage in pursuing or denied altogether. Statistically speaking, being a short man is as much of a disadvantage in the marketplace as being a woman or, in many contexts, black. Except there are no quotas or preferences for short men. There are so many ways my life would have been different if I were even a few inches taller.
I never wished I was taller. I never tried to make up for my lack of height with things like elevator shoes. I can’t imagine how much of my mindspace would have been frittered away thinking about such things or wishing I was something I was not, including all the times the world tried to remind me of my lack of stature. How much of my life was I willing to waste in anger or regret or, worst of all, activism in trying to make society (or at least cute girls) accept me as I am? Not one minute.

我是一個相對矮小的人。對此，我能想到一百件“不公正”的事情，我在追求妹子和不被拒絕方面，處于顯著的劣勢。
從統(tǒng)計數(shù)據(jù)來看，身材矮小的男性，在女性市場上，與許多情況下是黑人一樣處于劣勢。沒有什么為矮個子準備的配額和偏愛。如果我再高幾英寸，我的生活會有很多不同。
我從來不希望自己更高。我從來沒有試過用電梯鞋之類的東西來彌補我的身高不足。我無法想象我用很多思維空間浪費在思考這些事情上，或者希望我不是這樣的人，包括世界所有事情都在試圖提醒我身材矮小的時候。
我一生中有多少時間，可以浪費在憤怒或遺憾中，或者最糟糕的是，為了讓社會（或者至少是可愛的女孩）接受我的現(xiàn)狀而積極行動？
一分鐘都沒有。

As a short white man (though some people don’t even consider Jews “white”) living in America, I am in many ways ahead of 99% of all humans to have inhabited this planet. I can live in disappointment about what I don’t have and never could. Or I can live in gratitude with what I was given. Everybody has that choice. Even those among my family that survived the Holocaust had that choice. I’m guessing you do, too.

作為一個生活在美國的矮個子白人（盡管有些人甚至不認為猶太人是“白人”），我在很多方面都領(lǐng)先于這個星球上99%的人類。
我可以生活在失望中，但我沒有，也永遠不會。或者，我可以對所得到的一切心存感激。
每個人都有這樣的選擇。即使是我的家人中，那些在大屠殺中幸存下來的人，也有這樣的選擇。我猜你也是。

Frank Lazar
White America will never stop reminding you that your skin color, the way your eyes are set, means you’re not in the club.
You should be whoever you feel you are, but you should be aware that others will chose to perceive you as they do, not as you do.

美國白人永遠不會停止提醒你，你的膚色，你的眼睛，告訴你，你不是這個俱樂部的成員。
你應(yīng)該成為，你自己認為自己是誰的那個人，但你也要意識到，其他人會選擇以他們的方式來看待你，而不是以你的方式。
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Han Miano
Did you choose to be white? I’m sure you did not.
I don’t know if I need to be proud to be asian, all I know is I did not choose to be Asian. It happened that I was born in an asian country, and my parents are asian as well.
Race is just a human construct concept.
At the end of the day, there is only human race.

你選擇成為白人了嗎？我確信你沒有。
我不知道我是否需要為自己是亞洲人而自豪，我只知道做亞洲人不是我自己的選擇。我只是碰巧出生在一個亞洲國家，而我的父母也碰巧是亞洲人。
種族只是人類建構(gòu)的一個概念。
歸根結(jié)底，只有人類這個種族。

Edward Crosby
You should do neither of those things. Being proud to be asian is as equally idiotic as being proud to be white. So if you want to continue being an idiot, choose one of these equally stupid options.

這兩件事你都不應(yīng)該做。為自己是亞洲人而自豪，和為自己是白人而自豪，一樣愚蠢。所以，如果你想繼續(xù)做一個白癡，選擇其中一個同樣愚蠢的選擇。

Robert Alan Noble
Because it makes no bit of difference. You have more melanin than a white person and less than a black, but just as much of a human being as the rest of us.

因為這沒什么區(qū)別。你的黑色素比白人多，比黑人少，但和我們其他人一樣多。

Maciej Morycinski
Because pride does not come from identity. It comes from achevement.

驕傲不是來自身份。它來自于成就。

Jordan Zhouyi
Feifei has a good answer. I'd like to offer a different perspective.
I've been studying in China for close to a year now. Sometimes I take classes on a different campus, so I have to go through the subway regularly. I attend classes with Chinese students.

Feifei 給了一個很好的答案。我想提供一個不同視角的答案。
我已經(jīng)在中國學習將近一年了。有時我在不同的校園上課，所以我必須定期乘坐地鐵。我和中國學生一起上課。
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on the subway back to the dorm

在回宿舍的地鐵上

waiting for class to begin

等待上課

Point being, I spend a majority of my time being around people of a very different skin color to mine. (I'm black.)
They stare; it's obvious I'm different. Curiosity.
I make friends, we get along great, but there's always some sort of invisible, unspoken barrier there. Discussions about plans for the future that don't include me. Discussions about topics that I know nought about; places in the city I haven't been to, games I haven't played, songs I don't know.
I am with them, but I am not one of them. We're together, but we don't belong together.
There are times I wished I was Chinese. I was surprised at the thought.

重點是，我大部分時間都在和與我膚色截然不同的人在一起。（我是黑人。）
他們凝視著我，很明顯，我與眾不同。他們充滿好奇心。
我交朋友，我們相處得很好，但那里總是有某種無形的、無法言說的障礙。一些不包括我在內(nèi)的關(guān)于未來的討論。一些我一無所知的話題的討論。一些城市里我沒有去過的地方，我沒有玩過的游戲，我不知道的歌曲。
我和他們在一起，但我不是他們中的一員。我們在一起，但我們不屬于一起。
有時我希望自己是中國人。想到這里我很驚訝。

After reflecting on myself I realized deep down I don't really want that. I'm accepting and proud of what I am.
I just want to fit in, therefore I wanted to be like everyone else - Chinese.
If you sent me out of space and told me to go live with and go to school with a bunch of green aliens, given enough time, I'd wish I was a green alien, too.
The way you feel, it's not about race, or skin color. It's not about being white, or Asian, or black, nor is it about race superiority.
It's about wanting to fit it.

在反思自己之后，我意識到我其實并不想那樣。我接受自己并為自己感到驕傲。
我只是想融入其中，所以我想和其他人一樣——成為中國人。
如果你把我送出太空，讓我和一群綠色外星人一起生活和上學，給我足夠的時間，我希望我也是一個綠色外星人。
你的感覺與種族或膚色無關(guān)。這與身為白人、亞裔或黑人無關(guān)，也與種族優(yōu)越無關(guān)。
這是關(guān)于想要適應(yīng)它。
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I assume you live in an area where you're Asian and everyone else is white. I'd assume you're a teenager or young adult. We care about our peers' opinions so strongly at that age.
Only thing I can say is wait it out. Given enough time, you'll feel less strongly about such things.
Why should you be proud? To be happy.
You are what you are, you look the way you do. Nothing can change that. It's your identity. Own it.
Be accepting of it, if not happy with it, move on. There's always better things to worry about.

我假設(shè)你生活在一個你是亞洲人，而其他人都是白人的地區(qū)。我認為你是一個青少年或年輕人。在那個年紀，我們非常關(guān)心同齡人的意見。
我唯一能說的就是等它結(jié)束。如果有足夠的時間，你會對這些事情感覺不那么強烈。
你為什么要驕傲？為了快樂。
你就是你自己，你看起來就是你的樣子。沒有什么能改變這一點。這就是你的身份。承認你自己。
接受它，如果不滿意，就繼續(xù)前進?？傆懈玫氖虑樾枰獡摹?br />