為什么很多外國人在5-6年后離開日本?如果這是一個這么好的國家，人們?yōu)槭裁床涣粝聛砟?（下）

Funk
Lol! That this question popped up in my feed is remarkable! After being in Tokyo for 7 years, on this occasion, I’m returning to the US in 8 days. In total, coming & going, I’ve lived in Japan for about 15 years. There are a few reasons I decided to head back to the US…
#1) The population of metro Tokyo is about 14 mil people. I was raised in the countryside, so just the dense population started getting to me.
#2) Despite having gone to university in Japan, & being fluent in the language, it’s impossible to fit in as a foreigner. B/ I already knew this, since first coming 33 years ago.

哈哈！這個問題突然出現(xiàn)在我的推送中，真是令人驚嘆！我在東京生活了7年，值此之際，8天后就要回美國了。算上往返，我在日本生活了大約15年。有幾個原因促使我決定回到美國…
東京市區(qū)人口約1400萬。我在鄉(xiāng)村長大，所以密集的人口開始讓我感到不適。
盡管我在日本上了大學(xué)，日語也很流利，但作為一個外國人，想要融入這里幾乎是不可能的，我33年前第一次來的時候就知道這一點。

#3) Japan is 97% Japanese people. In the US African-Americans make up about 13% of the population. In Japan, African-Americans make up about .000013% of the population. So, I just am tired of being the pink poodle/ unicorn, everywhere I go.
#4) Tokyo is a great place to be a tourist, b/ horrible to be an expat. As a tourist, it’s easy to get away w/ breaking the rules. As an expat, following the rules is an important part of having a successful experience. & there are a million social rules to follow, in Tokyo, b/c it is so densely populated.

日本的日本人占了97%。在美國，非裔美國人約占總?cè)丝诘?3%。在日本，非裔美國人的比例大約只有0.000013%。所以，我厭倦了成為眾人矚目的焦點。
東京是一個旅游的好地方，但對外國人來說卻很可怕。作為游客，很容易逃避規(guī)則。作為外國人，遵循規(guī)則對于擁有一段成功的經(jīng)歷至關(guān)重要。。而且，因為東京人口密集，需要遵守的社會規(guī)則數(shù)不勝數(shù)。

#5) I had a GREAT job, so I was able to save up enough to have a house built & pay cash for it, back in the US, so I don’t have to deal w/ any banks, loans, a mortgage, interest, etc. I also had a great real estate agent! Moving to a place where the population is ONLY about 75,000 people!
#6) I turned 52 this year, and am tired of city life. Big cities are great for younger people, in my opinion. In Tokyo, there is not a lot of nature, the air is not clean, summer heat is unbearably hot/ humid, there is a lot of light pollution so I can’t see the stars at night, & I hardly see any animals or wildlife here. Tokyo is the very definition of concrete jungle!

我有一份很棒的工作，所以我存夠了錢，在美國建了房子，而且是一次性付清，這樣就不必和銀行、貸款、按揭、利息等打交道。我也遇到了一個很好的房地產(chǎn)經(jīng)紀(jì)人！我將搬到一個只有大約7.5萬人的小地方！
我今年52歲了，厭倦了都市生活。大城市對年輕人來說很棒，我是這么認(rèn)為的。在東京，自然景觀不多，空氣質(zhì)量不佳，夏天的高溫潮濕讓人難以忍受，光污染嚴(yán)重，晚上看不到星星，也幾乎看不到任何動物或野生動物，東京就是典型的混凝土叢林！

Takaba Nk
A friend put it nicely. “I’m completely in love with this beautiful country, I just can’t stand the Japanese.”
It was a joke of course and the person actually had good friends in Japan.
So why did this person say this?

一位朋友說得很好：“我完全愛上了這個美麗的國家，我只是無法忍受日本人。“
這當(dāng)然是個笑話，他在日本也有好朋友。
那么，他為什么會這么說呢？

Japanese people cannot handle conflict. Unable to debate, disagree, deal with unease in a relationship. They just cut ties and disappear at the first sight of friction.
They tie up their identity with their country too much. Foreigners criticizing Japan? They criticize me! This mentality drives people crazy. Not everything is shiny. Once a foreigner becomes critical then goodwill disappears. But can anyone stay uncritical for years? Can anybody just praise a country without any criticism? There can’t be any problems?
Extremely difficult to build meaningful relationships. Difficult to strike up a conversation. Frustrating small talk. One-trick ponies with only one hobby or interest. I hate to say this, but there are a lot of boring people all having the same shallow opinions and identical views. Lack of interest in ideas, especially abstract ones is a big problem. Practical, philistine mindset is common, luckily with a slight artistic/aesthetic bend. But, you need some country-level professor, artist, or some heavy-weight person to find someone truly interesting.

日本人不擅長處理沖突，不擅長辯論、不擅長拒絕、不擅長處理關(guān)系中的不適。他們一遇到摩擦就切斷聯(lián)系，然后消失。
他們過于將自己的身份認(rèn)同與國家緊密相連。如果有外國人批評日本，他們感覺就像在批評自己一樣！這種心態(tài)會讓人抓狂。事物不可能總是完美無缺的。一旦外國人提出批評，之前的熱情和友好往往就會消失。但是，誰能夠多年來一直保持完全不批評的態(tài)度呢？誰又能只對一個國家進(jìn)行贊美而不提出任何批評呢？這個國家真的沒有任何問題嗎？
建立有意義的人際關(guān)系極其困難，很難開始對話，閑聊令人沮喪。許多人只有一種愛好或興趣，我討厭這么說，但有很多無聊的人都持有同樣膚淺的觀點和相同的觀點。我不得不說，對思想尤其是抽象思想的興趣不足是一個嚴(yán)重的問題。實用主義和庸俗的心態(tài)很常見，幸運的是還有輕微的藝術(shù)和美學(xué)傾向。但是，你需要遇到一些國家級的教授、藝術(shù)家或重量級人物，才能找到真正有趣的人。

They try to do their best at work, in relationships, and in other social situations. This by itself is admirable. This is probably the best quality in Japan. A strive for excellence. Craftsmanship. Pursuing perfection. However, at the same time this makes people extremely critical of others. I worked so hard, and he just did a shortcut? Lousy, unfair, free rider, etc. They immediately criticize. They are critical of people working in the service industries and in business in general. They have extreme expectation of quality and service. This leads to a toxic work environment that wants to avoid any criticism. Employees suffer.
No concept of work-life balance. Secretly, people think that those who take the life part seriously are lazy, selfish, not hardworking, disloyal, not group-oriented enough. So, people do their best not to be tagged these and give up the life part.
Lots of comparisons. You need to be identical or else, they walk away. “Oh, they are not a good fit for me. I don’t waste my time on them.” This makes relationship building stressful and relationships boring. If we are identical then what is interesting?

他們在工作、人際關(guān)系和其他社交場合都盡力做到最好。這本身是令人欽佩的，可能是日本最好的優(yōu)點——追求卓越、工匠精神、追求完美。然而，這也使他們對他人極其挑剔。我辛辛苦苦地工作，而他只是走了捷徑？令人厭惡，這太不公平了，簡直就是搭便車。他們會立刻提出批評。他們通常對服務(wù)行業(yè)和商界的工作者要求苛刻。他們對產(chǎn)品和服務(wù)的質(zhì)量有著極高的期待。這種態(tài)度營造了一個充滿壓力的工作環(huán)境，員工們努力避免受到任何批評，這讓他們倍感痛苦。
沒有工作與生活平衡的概念。人們暗地里認(rèn)為那些重視生活的人是懶惰的、自私的、不努力的、不忠誠的、不夠有團(tuán)隊精神。所以，人們盡量不被貼上這些標(biāo)簽，放棄了生活。
人們之間充滿了相互比較。如果你和他們不是完全一樣，他們就會轉(zhuǎn)身離去，說：“哦，我們性格不合。我不想在這樣的人身上浪費時間?！边@種態(tài)度讓建立關(guān)系變得充滿壓力，也讓人際關(guān)系變得枯燥無味。如果我們的想法和行為都一模一樣，那生活還有什么新奇和趣味可言呢？

People pretend, asskiss, fake/hide emotions, over-interpret, backstab, plot in the background, push out others, make factions etc. Constant stress, like in a medi palace drama of scheming individuals and factions. Stressful and tiring.
Honesty is not valued. People think that honesty is childish. Hiding one’s emotions is the mark of an adult. Saying what’s on your mind is childish, uncivilized. This does not mean that they lie, or that they are dishonest in a bad way, they just don’t say what they really think. And this makes foreigners crazy. Number one complaint about Japan.
“Gaman” culture. Endurance, especially mental endurance, is esteemed off-the-charts high. However, this leads to people enduring meaningless and stupid things which is not needed. Masochistic endurance races are common in companies to show who is the better worker. Smart work is not valued, enduring mindless things is valued extremely high. Marks you out as loyal and hard working. Smart work is seen as corner-cutting, uncommitted, sly. The man who stays for the meaningless meeting until eight on Sunday is a saint. The man who propose a new tool that would cut workloads is a disloyal, lazy, selfish guy who only cares about reducing his own workload.

人們偽裝、拍馬屁、隱藏情緒、過度解讀、背后捅刀、策劃、排斥他人、制造派系等等。持續(xù)的壓力，就像在中世紀(jì)宮廷劇中，充滿陰謀的個人和派系，讓人感覺壓力很大，很累。
誠實不被重視。人們認(rèn)為誠實是幼稚的。隱藏自己的情緒是成年人的標(biāo)志。說出你的想法是幼稚的，不文明的。這并不意味著他們在撒謊，或者他們在不好的方面不誠實，他們只是沒有說出他們真正的想法。這讓外國人抓狂——對日本人這一點極為抱怨。
“忍耐”文化。耐力，特別是心理耐力，被高度重視。然而，這導(dǎo)致人們毫無意義地忍受不必要的事情。在公司中，為了展示誰是更好的工人，常見的是無意義的耐力競賽。聰明的工作不被重視，毫無意義的事情被極度重視——這標(biāo)志著你忠誠和努力工作。聰明的工作被視為走捷徑、不承諾、狡猾。那個在星期天呆到晚上八點參加毫無意義的會議的人是圣人。提出一種可以減少工作量的新工具的人是一個不忠誠、懶惰、自私的家伙，他只關(guān)心減少自己的工作量。

Mindless hierarchy, meaningless meetings, outdated methods, incompetent managers. All because people cannot say what they should be saying. Workplaces are full of cowards, yes men, and conformist followers of the great top management. Once someone steps out of line, they will be tagged for life as troublemakers. The top go at them, and nobody goes to the rescue even if they know that those on the top are wrong.
Mindless belief in leaders. Age and gender discrimination in subtle ways. Young members and low-ranking women especially are not encouraged to speak out in meetings, etc. Know your place mentality left over from the Confucian past.
Galapagos syndrome. People know less about the world, than the Chinese who are blocked by a censorship firewall. The Japanese are not interested in the world. Their little world is enough. Just a few stereotypes will do. Much interest go to America and Western Europe, maybe a few friendly, unthreatening developing countries. The rest is just not interesting. This also makes them arrogant, not knowing what is going on in the world.
Maybe a bit harsh, but hopefully it helps someone. After knowing the country for a very long time, I guess there is some truth to the above.

愚蠢的等級制度，無意義的會議，過時的方法，不稱職的管理者。都是因為人們不敢說出他們應(yīng)該說的話。職場上滿是懦夫、唯命是從的人，以及那些只會追隨高層領(lǐng)導(dǎo)的順從者。一旦有人偏離了常規(guī)，他們就會被永久地標(biāo)記為惹麻煩的人。高層會對他們進(jìn)行攻擊，即便其他人意識到高層的做法是錯誤的，也沒有人會挺身而出提供幫助。
對領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者的盲目信仰。以微妙的方式進(jìn)行年齡和性別歧視。年輕的成員和低級別的女性在會議等場合特別不被鼓勵發(fā)言，等等。知道自己的位置，這都是儒家思想遺留下來的。
加拉帕戈斯綜合癥。人們對世界的了解程度比被審查防火墻封鎖的中國人還少。日本人對了解世界不感興趣。他們只關(guān)心自己的小圈子，依賴一些刻板印象來了解外界。他們主要關(guān)注美國和西歐的情況，偶爾也會對一些友好且沒有威脅的發(fā)展中國家表示興趣。對于其他國家，他們則顯得不太關(guān)心。這種狹隘的世界觀讓他們變得驕傲自滿，對全球的動態(tài)和變化知之甚少。
或許這些話聽起來有些嚴(yán)苛，但希望它能夠?qū)δ承┤擞兴鶈l(fā)。深入了解這個國家多年后，我相信上述觀點中確實包含了一些真實的情況。

Edit:
By honesty, I’ve meant straightforwardness and saying what one really has to say, including negative opinions, or things that will cause conflict.

編輯：
我所說的誠實，是指坦率和說出一個人真正必須說的話，包括負(fù)面意見或可能引起沖突的事情。

Nik Frengle
Why do many foreigners leave Japan after 5-6 years? If it is so good a country, why don't people stay?
I lived in Japan for a total of about 15 years, on three different stints of 18 months, six months, and 13 years.
For me there were two aspects that caused me to leave and not go back, albeit after 13 years, not 5–6.

為何許多外國人在日本生活5到6年后選擇離開？如果日本真有那么好，為何人們不留下來？
我本人在日本總共居住了大約15年，分為三個階段：第一次18個月，第二次6個月，最后一次13年。
有兩個主要原因促使我離開日本，并且不打算再次回去，盡管我在那里待了13年，超出了通常的5到6年。
原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) http://mintwatchbillionaireclub.com 轉(zhuǎn)載請注明出處

Work
I partially agree with a previous answer that suggested that 5–6 years is a period where career and work necessitate leaving Japan, particularly for those who first go to Japan straight out of university, in their early 20’s. The reality is that a majority of Westerners are in Japan teaching English or other languages. Scoring a ‘proper’ job is difficult, because you have to deal with not only speaking fluent Japanese, but your utility will mainly be seen as your command of English, because if you came to Japan in your early 20’s, there is a pretty good chance that you didn’t have a lot of experience prior to that. It is not impossible to find a proper job, but among my group of acquaintances, I am the only one I know to do so. So, the answer may be to leave and get experience. And, yes, the rose-coloured glasses mean that you think things will be better in your home country. And the truth is that even in a ‘proper’ job, even if you are in a foreign-affiliated company, you will likely face a glass ceiling. I hit this working for Vodafone, when I was told straight up “you are really qualified, but sorry, you are a gaijin,” when being considered for a promotion.

工作
我部分同意之前一個答案的觀點，它提出5到6年是職業(yè)生涯發(fā)展需要離開日本的一個時期，特別是對于那些剛從大學(xué)畢業(yè)、20歲出頭就直接去日本的人。現(xiàn)實情況是，大多數(shù)西方人在日本從事英語或其他語言的教學(xué)工作。想要在日本找到一份“正規(guī)”的工作非常困難，因為你不僅要日語流利，而且你的主要價值很可能僅僅是你的英語能力。如果你20多歲來到日本，很可能在那之前并沒有太多工作經(jīng)驗。找到一份正規(guī)工作并非不可能，但在我認(rèn)識的人群中，只有我做到了。所以，可能的解決辦法是離開日本，去積累經(jīng)驗。當(dāng)然，帶著那些理想化的幻想，你總覺得自己回國后一切都會變得更好。但實際上，即使你在一家外資公司的正規(guī)工作中，你也可能會遭遇職業(yè)發(fā)展的“玻璃天花板”。我在沃達(dá)豐工作時就遇到了這種情況，當(dāng)我被考慮晉升時，他們直接告訴我：“你非常合格，但對不起，你是個外國人”。
原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) http://mintwatchbillionaireclub.com 轉(zhuǎn)載請注明出處

Belonging
But there is another thing, not only economic, but the emotional need for a sense of belonging to a place: After 5 or 6 years, although in my case it took 13 years, it may become obvious that even though you may speak very good Japanese, may have adopted some of the attitudes, may have a Japanese significant other, sleep on a futon in a tatami room, and even have corn on your pizza, you will never be accepted. As a white or black foreigner, you will never be accepted as one of the group. And in Japan that is really important. If you are not one of the wareware Nihonjin, you are an outsider, and will always be treated so. Having invested considerable time in learning a quite difficult language and customs, it hurts to realise that, to some extent, that has been in vain. The hurt may be sufficient to cause you to leave.

歸屬感
但還有另一個問題，不僅僅是經(jīng)濟(jì)層面的，更關(guān)乎情感上的歸屬感：過了5年或6年，盡管在我這里花了13年，你可能會發(fā)現(xiàn)，即使你的日語說得很好，可能已經(jīng)采納了一些日本的生活方式，可能有了一個日本伴侶，睡在榻榻米房間的蒲團(tuán)上，甚至在披薩上放玉米，你仍然無法被完全接受。作為一個白人或黑人，你永遠(yuǎn)不會被視為群體的一部分。在日本，視為群體的一部分真的很重要。如果你不是我們?nèi)毡救酥械囊粏T，你就是一個局外人，永遠(yuǎn)會被這樣對待。在投入了大量時間學(xué)習(xí)一門相當(dāng)難的語言和習(xí)俗之后，意識到這一點，這在某種程度上，你的努力似乎白費了。這種認(rèn)識可能會讓你感到痛苦，足以促使你離開。

Edit: There were a fair few comments asking for examples of times when I felt that I was made to feel that I didn’t belong. I would say that these incidents for the most part were everyday things: There only being one seat open on a train (next to you) and no one choosing to use the seat; being stopped by policemen for no discernible reason other than ethnicity; being told that a bar you wanted to go into was full (despite it obviously not being); shop clerks looking really alarmed when you went towards them. There were also very overt times: The rental landlord saying straight up that they won’t rent to a foreigner; the employer saying straight up that they would never employ a foreigner; the mother saying to her child (in Japanese, thinking I couldn’t understand) not to sit next to the foreigner. The everyday things happened, well…every day. There was one guy who commented that he would get me a tissue. I am not a victim, and I don’t cry into my pillow every night because of how I was treated. I was stating why I wouldn’t want to live or work in Japan after the 13 or so years I have already lived there. And I realise that this happens in other countries. In fact, I am an American, and have lived in the UK for the last 17 years since I left Japan. And I can say that, yes, there is sometimes the feeling of being an outsider here, as one Kiwi said, but it is nothing like the every day occurence it was in Japan. There are times when standing out is nice. But in Japan that definitely separates you, and a sense of belonging is difficult. I was telling of my experience, though. I loved lots of things about the 13 years I was there, but I have chosen not to spend my life there.

編輯：很多人在評論中要求我給出讓我感到不受歡迎的例子。我想說，這些情況大多是日常小事：比如火車上只有一個空位（恰好在你旁邊），卻沒人選擇坐下；沒有明顯原因只是因為種族特征而被警察攔下；被告知你想進(jìn)的酒吧已經(jīng)滿員了（盡管顯然沒有）；店員看到你走向他們時顯得非常驚慌。也有一些非常明顯的例子：房東直接說他們不會租房給外國人；雇主明確表示他們永遠(yuǎn)不會雇傭外國人；一位母親用日語對她的孩子說（以為我聽不懂）不要坐在外國人旁邊。這些日常小事每天都在發(fā)生。有人評論說他會給我一張紙巾，但我不是受害者，我不會因為我受到的待遇而每晚哭泣。我講述的是我為什么不想在日本生活和工作——盡管我已經(jīng)在那里生活了13年左右。我知道這種情況在其他國家也會發(fā)生。事實上，我是美國人，自從離開日本后，我在英國生活了17年。我可以說，是的，有時候也有被當(dāng)作局外人的感覺，但這和在日本每天發(fā)生的情況完全不同，在英國，有時候與眾不同是件好事。但在日本，這絕對會讓你感到孤立，很難獲得歸屬感。不過我講的是我的經(jīng)歷。我喜歡我在那里的13年經(jīng)歷的的很多事情，但我選擇不在那里度過我的一生。